Boundaries not only protect us, they make it possible for us to let others in. However, if your emotional sensitivity is a survival mechanism, it can feel impossible to stop taking responsibility for others. In episode 20, I describe the challenge of boundaries for highly empathic people and include essential action steps for restoring a feeling of control in your relationships.
1:09 I got confused about boundaries at a young age
2:30 I call this “empathy activated in the jungle”
3:10 Empathy without boundaries exacts a high price from the empathizer
3:57 How Obi-Wan Kenobi guided the Jedi’s to befriend the force
4:22 Our adult work is to install the control deck
4:45 We lose respect for ourselves when we let others overstep us
5:15 I fall in love with myself when this happens
6:10 Boundaries help us feel the magnet
6:38 You can be with them but not become them
6:45 Aaron Johnson of Holistic Resistance and his example of boundaries
7:22 “To not be invincible is how I ground myself”
8:19 This is a good way to start your boundaries practice
8:58 This week’s practice
9:28 Boundary mantras to repeat
Resources: Holistic Resistance and their anti-racist, community fostering programs have changed my life. I can’t recommend them enough and encourage you to sign up for one of their offerings.
Dr. Jessica Tartaro
Intimacy Coach & Connection Facilitator
Pronouns “She” + “Her”
“Contact me to schedule an initial, complimentary consultation – called an Exploratory – to explore the fit for coaching together.”
Looking for tools you can immediately apply to improve your relationships? Tune into weekly installments of “Under 10: A Mini Intimacy Podcast with Dr. Jessica Tartaro“.