The default is to see others through a narrow lens of what separates us. In Episode 38, I challenge you to look for what connects you to others and take your power back to shape your perception of the people around you.

1:20 I serenade you.

2:32 When we are scared, our tendency is to find someone we can pin the pain on.

2:45 I define what it means to “other”.

3:45 Anais Nin quote

4:30 Perception is a practice.

5:21 The word “sonder” from the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows

6:26 Actively searching for points of commonality to find ourselves in the other

7:10 The inner work of humanizing

8:14 A first step towards shifting out of dehumanizing

8:58 We are wired to empathize.

9:05  This week’s homework: 2 parts.


Love, Serve & Remember by John Astin . Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows which includes the definition of “sonder”.  The Anais Nin Foundation.

Podcast produced by Sal DeRosalia
Music composed and performed by Aimee Mia Kelley
Photo by Andriyko Podilnyk on Unsplash

Contact Information

Dr. Jessica Tartaro
Intimacy Coach & Connection Facilitator
Pronouns “She” + “Her”

Telephone: 1 (480) 993-5562

“Contact me to schedule an initial, complimentary consultation – called an Exploratory – to explore the fit for coaching together.”

Looking for tools you can immediately apply to improve your relationships? Tune into weekly installments of “Under 10: A Mini Intimacy Podcast with Dr. Jessica Tartaro“.