This Relationship Came To Teach Us: A Couples Program

This program involves an immersive experience of working with me for 6 months (3 months minimum) to combine both couples and individual coaching to radically redesign how you relate to one another and to yourselves.

This program is right for you if:

  • You are deeply committed to your relationship. You want to make this work and are willing to invest the time and energy it takes to change.
  • The stressors of life have piled up and your love for one another has gotten buried.  
  • Your relationship has pushed your buttons and you feel irritated, drained and hopeless about your future together.
  • A "quick fix" just won't do it.  You realize it's going to take more than that.
  • You would do almost anything to get back to the days when you were kind to each other, you laughed often, your flirted effortlessly and the sex was fun and frequent.

Does this sound like you?  If so, welcome.  There’s hope.

The aim of this program is to combine individual and couples work to give your relationship a Rest & Reset.  


The "Rest" involves focusing on how you can use your individual sessions to get into a deeper, more intimate relationship with yourself and free the relationship from the responsibility of meeting all of both of your needs.  

No relationship can handle that.  

Yet at the same time, loving relationship often magnifies the parts of us as individuals that need attention.  When we are lucky enough to love and be loved this deeply, the opportunity arises to heal those parts so that the relationship can be vastly improved.  Rather than mistake the relationship as the answer to all unresolved issues, the relationship becomes the catalyst for personal healing.

REST stands for:

R - Radical acceptance of what our relationship shows us about ourselves

E - Exploration of our feelings and what they tell us about what we need

S - Self care and a willingness to prioritize time addressing our own needs

T - Trust in our partner to do the same

In individual sessions with each of you we will work closely to understand your triggers and unhealthy relating patterns so that you can design a new pathway forward for living as you and in connection to your partner.


The "Reset" portion of the program involves integrating practices and skills so that when you come together as a couple, your communication, your love and your sex emerge from that new healthy place.  Instead of demanding that the other person change for us, we will focus on how you can learn and grow from what is present in the here and now, without trying to change it! 

RESET stands for:

R - Renewing our commitment to our partner

E - Energizing our connection through cultivating gratitude and generosity in connection

S - Savoring the small moments

E - Embodying values through regular sexual practices.

T - Turning on our capacity for pleasure, joy, connection and love

In sessions together I will teach you how to build turn-on every hour of the day, how to use judgment as a doorway to connection rather than blame and how to draw upon personalized rituals in order to revive and reset your relationship again and again as needed.

What will I get out of this program?

Couples who commit to this program can expect:

  • Renewed confidence for how to handle stressful times as a team
  • Diminished reactivity and impulse to “bolt” out of the relationship
  • Expanded capacity to take responsibility for yourself in partnership
  • Strengthened commitment to a mindful, compassionate relationship with yourself
  • Release from the “pressure to please” as a drive in connection
  • Freedom from depending on one another for your security and happiness
  • A new definition of vulnerability including authentic, real time communication
  • Reinvigoration of desire and sexual sparks flying between you
  • A toolbox of sexual and sensual practices for sustaining that turn on
  • Access to a bottomless well of gratitude for yourself and one another
  • Restored sense of reverence for the value of your commitment

Format of the Program

Unlimited access to me Monday-Friday, 9am-5pm PST.  This includes:

  • Unlimited in-person one or two-hour sessions as scheduling permits
  • Unlimited video coaching sessions
  • Unlimited phone, text and email contact with 24 hour turnaround time

Read about one married couple's experience of this program so far.

Through our intimacy program with her, Dr. Jessica has brought me hope. The all-inclusive access to her support is allowing me to build trust. Trust that there can be solutions and that there is a way to create something stronger than the dysfunction. Having access to Dr. Jessica in moments of fight or flight has greatly helped my recovery time in addition to being able to breathe a sigh of relief when she responds in that way she just knows how.

Not all intimacy coaching sessions are going to be serious. My wife and I have laughed our ass off at times. Dr. Jessica allows the clients to take direction and builds on what is taking place in that moment. This program has been fun and provides me a platform to discuss deeply intimate topics without fear of judgment.

When we first started working with Jessica over a year, ago my wife and I were trying to find common ground. Now we work with her to learn about sustaining positive momentum, avoiding conflict, active listening, and advanced understanding.  Ultimately, I believe that this program has saved me from myself. It provided my wife and I an opportunity to learn more about ourselves and that has saved our marriage.

Dr. Jessica this has been one of the most challenging yet rewarding experiences of our lives and we look forward to continuing our journey.

- Mike & Jamie Damaschke



Cost of the program is $1995/month for 3 or 6 months to be paid at a regular date each month.  First month payment required as deposit to start the program.


Conscious Orgasm

 I specialize in teaching a simple, 15-minute partnered sexuality practiced called Conscious Orgasm, or CO for short. Through CO I have woven together mindful communication practices with the sexual potency of OM to create a transformative tool for singles and couples.

Couples Coaching

We all want relationships that thrive. The ones where you are equal parts friend, partner and lover, and can stay connected through the ups and down. I believe that you can have it. That we all can.


If you want to open your heart, start with your body.  Movement practices are a vital doorway into discovering what is true inside of us so that we can connect authentically with others.  I teach dance events at the intersection of intimacy, consent, improvisation and community.

Communication Games

Ever wanted to feel the freedom to say just exactly what you always felt? Feel like you are always hiding behind the “polite thing” or the “safe guy or girl strategy?” Most people do. You are not alone. What if you had the tools to unlock the thoughts that live in your head and express yourself freely to others?

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