“I’m surprised I’ve gazed at you so long without kissing you,” he told me recently.
“Maybe it’s because you haven’t asked to kiss me”, I replied.
He paused. “Do I have to ask?”
It was that choice point again . Risk “ruining the moment” by asserting that consent always matters, even with all the non-verbal affirmations we had already shared. Or laugh it off, act cool and let it go.
Lucky for me, I’ve been here before.
And I know that it is *actually* consent that makes it juicier, despite the voices in my head that would tell me otherwise.
“Yes…you…must…ask,” I said slowly and deliberately. “Because it helps me be present for what is coming when I give consent. And I so want to be present for the moment of our first kiss”.
He breathed. Half smiled. And began again.
“May I?”
And the fireworks began.
#ConsentIsWhatMakesItJuicy #ChoiceAtTheTransitions #TurnedOnAwake
Photo by henri meilhac on Unsplash
[…] I have done on this topic, including a blog about my first kiss with my husband. And an older blog about this tool here, also published in […]